Pom-Poms and a Super Soaker!

Important elements in being a responsible father.

Last night, Bethany showed me a TV commercial promoting fatherhood. It was of a father with his daughter "rehearsing cheerleading routines with his daughter." It was so funny! The commercial was created by the National Responsible Fatherhood Clearinghouse (fatherhood.org). In visiting their website, I found a second movie (equally funny) about a dad and his son who were "engaged in a serious 'super soaker' battle." Links to the movies are here (cheerleading) and here (battle).

Fatherhood is one of the greatest things about my life. The births of my children account for four of the best days of my life. True, it's not always fun and games and regularly requires hard work and dicipline but when Johnny yells, "I love you!" as I'm walking out the door to work or when Sabrina makes her "Oh no!" dramatic face at me, it pays off! These commercials are great reminders of how great being a father is. In fact, I like them so much that I think I want my own set of pom-poms and a super soaker for Christmas!

That one Christmas...

I have a few memories of times when I've gone looking for trouble. I have always had a difficult time sleeping through the night on Christmas Eve. The excitement of presents and surprises and food and fun builds up the whole week before until I'm brimming with anticipation. The suspense finally overpowers any desire to sleep, usually between 1:45 a.m. and 2:30 a.m. Christmas morning.

And so it happened one Christmas when I was somewhere between 8 and 10 years old. I woke up and checked the time to once again find out I was up too early. It always killed me to realize I still had several hours before Mom or Dad would allow us to come out of our rooms to open presents. But a trip down the hallway to the living room and the Christmas tree would most definitely go unnoticed so I did it. I quietly tiptoed into the living room and flipped on the lights to see a marvelous array of presents bulging from beneath the Christmas tree. At that point, it wasn't enough to just stand at the entrance to the living room and observe the presents from afar. I had to investigate further. You see, that year, I wanted a skateboard for Christmas and Mom and Dad didn't really seem to let on that such a request of Santa would be a possibility. And from about 20 feet away, I couldn't make out the shape of a skateboard from any of the presents in sight. So curiosity got the better of me and I went for a closer look... with my hands.

Also to note, somehow or other, my younger sister, Crystal, was awake. I must have woken her up and talked her in to coming with me to the living room. (Her mistake! -- Sorry Crys!!!)

I started lifting presents and shaking them gently. That didn't produce much knowledge regarding what was in them. Then, in a flash, the wrong idea played out in my mind and I knew what I had to do if I were going to know more about the contents of those wrapped presents. I tried carefully sliding my finger in between the folds of the wrapping paper. The first few times, I was pretty careful and untaped the wrapping paper while keeping it in tact. I got through a few unmarked presents (those are presents without nametags) before finally ripping the wrapping paper. I panicked but quickly remembered where Mom kept the wrapping paper and decided to just rewrap it. In fact, I realized I could rewrap any of the presents I would thereafter unwrap as I was pretty sure there was enough wrapping paper.

There was one present in particular that did not have a nametag on it. It was small and it fit inside a little ceramic cup I made for my mom a year or so before. I figured that where it was in the cup I made that perhaps the present was for me. I unwrapped it, not being too careful and ruining the wrapping paper around it. It was a little jewelry case with some earrings. Obviously it wasn't for me.

I snooped around the room some more and actually came across an orange skateboard behind the couch! I was thrilled, elated, even in seventh heaven! My crusade was a success.

At that point I realized I needed to rewrap some of the presents so I went to get some new wrapping paper. There wasn't any paper with the same design on it so I just picked something Christmasy and rewrapped them, placing them back where I remember finding them. Crystal and I went back to bed and got up a few hours later for the festivities.

We started unwrapping presents but I was too eager to wait. Without any prompting from Mom or Dad, I went for my skateboard. That must have tipped them off that I knew something they didn't. But when I took the little present from the ceramic cup and handed it to my Mom, Sherlock Dad put two and two together and halted Christmas. I was interrogated as to how I new about the skateboard and Mom's present.

The truth came out, and Christmas was ruined. Crystal and I were banished to chairs in the kitchen. Through tear-filled eyes, we stared at our own little corners of the kitchen while Dad threatened to take our gifts to Deseret Industries. I don't remember how long we sat on chairs but it could have been for a few hours.

After the dust settled, we were allowed to get off our chairs and later that day we got our presents. The next year, though, Mom and Dad moved the big recliner down the hall to a spot in front of my bedroom door and tied the doornob to it to protect the Christmas presents from me.

Crazy, huh!?! What's the worst thing you've ever done around Christmas?

Nectar of the soda gods

I have a few other friends that are talking up their dietary programs and exercise regiments on their blogs. I thought I'd go ahead and balance out the Internet with a plug for my favorite holiday soda! (If you can't see the humor in this, don't read on.) This is Pomegranate 7-Up! It's awesome! This is the second year that I've see this stuff and I've started to stock it at home. Just over a week ago while Bethany was at the store, I got this crazy thought that I should have her bring home a few extra bottles. She laughed at me but fulfilled the request.

So if you're out this way and need something to wet your whistle, stop on by for a drink.

While supplies last. Void where prohibited. Not valid with any other offer. Nevada and Utah residents only.

America's James Bond

I'm looking forward to the new James Bond movie coming out this weekend! I wouldn't consider myself to be a huge James Bond fan but I did enjoy the last James Bond movie, Casino Royale, with Daniel Craig. His style of James Bond went over really well with me. In fact, in preparation for this weekend's premier, I rented Casino Royale again and Bethany and I watched it late one night this week.

Anyway, back in 2006 when that movie first came out, I wondered if there was anyone in our American culture that could be a somewhat similar icon, like what James Bond is to Britain. I couldn't come up with a glamourized American spy. In broadening my circle to include any decent American action figure, I somewhat settled on Indian Jones. He's no spy but he's legendary when it comes to action and he's definitely an American icon. But that opinion changed drastically with this latest Indiana Jones movie, The Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. In my opinion, I think Hollywood shot us in the foot as it was a half-baked movie, barely worth the price we spent to rent it. How disappointing.

By the way, I have deeper thoughts than this usually but today, I'm focusing on issues related to the upcoming James Bond movie, so please excuse me.

But, I have recently decided that Jason Bourne from the Bourne movies could be a better fit. He hasn't been around nearly as long as James Bond. But Hollywood has developed him well so far. In fact, while I'm not necessarily wanting to pit America against England, from what I saw in the Bourne Ultimatum, I could see Jason Bourne beat the tar out of James Bond.

Can you think of someone who would fit better into the role of America's James Bond? What do you think about Ethan Hunt (Tom Cruise) from the Mission: Impossible series?

Or what about Kenny Balser!?! Sure, he's not as popular as Tom Cruise or Daniel Craig but I can totally see him in the role of James Bond with an American attitude! We could start a campaign. Balser for Double-0 Status! Go Kenny! Bring it!